INTRO: Stum the "E" DRUM VERSES (Chords shown, strike once..then drums only until riff) Well, I guess it was back in '63 When eatin' my cookin' got the better of me lead guitar } So I asked this little girl I was goin' with to be my wife Well, she said she would...So I said,'I do' But I'da said, 'I wouldn't'.If I'da just knew how sayin' 'I do' } Was gonna screw up all o' my life Well, the first few years weren't all that bad I'll never forget the good times we had } Cause I'm reminded every month when I send her the child sup-port Well, it wasn't too long til the lust all died And I'll admit I wasn't too surprised } The day I came home and found my suitcase sittin'out on the porch CHORDED VERSES Well, I tried to get in, she changed the lock ....Then I found this note taped on the mailbox that said } ....'Goodbye, turkey...My attorney will be in touch' So I decided right then and there ...I was gonna do what's right...Give 'er her fair share } ...But, brother, I didn't know her share was gonna be that much CHORUS She got the gold mine (She got the gold mine) I got the shaft (I got the shaft) They split it right down the middle (stop) (Bass) Note And then they give her the better half Well, it all sounds sorta funny But it hurts too much to laugh She got the gold mine,..I got the shaft DRUM VERSES Now listen up...you ain't heard nothin' yet Why, they give 'er the color televison set } Then they give 'er the house, the kids and both of the cars See Well, then they started talkin' about child support, alimony..And the costs to the court } Didn't take me long to figure out how far in the toilet I was CHORDED VERSES I'm tellin' ya, they have made a mistake ..'Cause it adds up to more than this cowboy makes } ..Besides, everythin' I ever had worth takin'they've already took While she's livin' like a queen on alimony ...I'm workin' two shifts, eatin' baloney } ...Askin' myself, 'Why didn't you just learn how to cook?' CHORUS They give her the gold mine (She got the gold mine) They give me the shaft (I got the shaft) They said they splittin' it all down the middle (stop) Note) But she got the better half Well, it all sounds sorta funny But it hurts too much to laugh She got the gold mine,..I got the shaft CHORUS INSTRUMENTALLY CHORUS /VOCALS Well, She got the gold mine (She got the gold mine) I got the shaft (I got the shaft) They split it all down the middle (stop) (Bass Note) But they give her the better half Well, it all sounds mighty funny(Ooh, ooh, ha ha ha) But it hurts too much to laugh She got the gold mine,.I got the shaft OUTRO VERSE Yea, I ain't kiddin..I got the shaft ...But I don't have to worry about totin' a billfold anymore ....Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ....I let my wife tote it...I'm gonna be carryin' food stamps You get it, judge...I'm gonna be indebted ...That's not funny....Huh... ...Contempt of court. - E (fade) What do you mean..I'm in contempt of court