When You're A Transformer

Tripod

Y & S: (Both start singing at the same time with different words) Scod: Don't I start this? Yon: No! Scod: No, you do! Oh yeah, sorry. My fault. Yon: You can join in if you want... but don't fuck it up. Yon: They say that if you try, you'll achieve your dreams, Em But who will pay the price in between? Tripod: Glu-glung, glu-glung, glu-glung, glu-glung, Glu-glung glung glung! Gatesy: That's pretty good. Gatesy: You'd hope that being family was enough, But circumstances can be tough. Tripod: Glu-glung, glu-glung, glu-glung, glu-glung, Glu-glung glung! Scod: You have to choose, (let ring) And one of you must lose... On the world of Transformers, The man Transformers are in charge. Tripod: You never hear about, The lady Transformers. Yon: But they do exist, and they often come... ... in pairs, not "come"... Yon: I don't mean...! Gatesy: They exist! Y & G: Exist, exist, exist, exist! Tripod: The sisters' names, (let ring) Are Weapontron and... Kate? And through this game, Their love has turned to... hate? When you're a Transformer, You will see that some things never change. They might re-arrange, Into a car, a truck, a plane. But if you're Weapontron and Kate, You might not have so much luck, You might not turn into a truck. How does a Transformer get ahead, When the thing they turn into is fairy bread? Yon: Weapontron and Kate had to find a skill, Because they couldn't fight or kill. Tripod: And their transformations, Weren't that much to see. Scod: But they had photographic memory, And lots of mental energy. Tripod: And so they entered, A Transformer spelling bee, Scod: Which caused sibling rivalry. (Scod plays throughout the spelling bee) Gatesy: So, young sisters! It is down to you two. You have beaten all the other pissweak Transformers, including the formidable one that turned into a doughnut - Doughnutron. Weapontron, spell "Xerox"! Yon: Xerox. Triple-Z... Gatesy: (Buzzer noise) Yon: No, no, no, no, no! X... Z... Gatesy: (Buzzer noise) Okay, you are out of the game. If Kate wins, there certainly will be Something for Kate. (To audience) I wrote that one! Scod: He insisted that joke go in. Yon: There was no time to stop him! Gatesy: They don't give these jobs to monkeys. Kate! Spell "haemorrhoids"! Yon: Haemorrhoids. H... M... Gatesy: (Buzzer noise) Wrong! But in order for this song to make sense... Kate, you win! Tripod: When you're a Transformer, You will see that some things never change. They might re-arrange, Into a car, a truck, a plane. But if you're Weapontron and Kate, You might not have so much luck, You might not turn into a truck. How does a Transformer get ahead, When the thing they turn into is fairy bread?